Cultural degradation at the hands of Michelle Obama, Wilma Proops and the “beautiful” people

By Suzanne Eovaldi, staff writer

 Starting her day with rashers of free range turkey glasses of red fruits juices and a ten minute workout on the Vibration Exercise Machine which she uses on advice from “Aunt Agony to the stars”, Liverpudlian Wilma Proops is giving our First Lady a toned body.    

  What with the heavy schedule of White House entertainment and full plate dinners, Michelle Obama is taking care of herself in all of the right ways, especially after having served her guests $150 lb Waygu beef entrees. 

 Now, just who is this loon Aunt Agony?  Wilma Proops appeared on the international stage, according to her own autobiography “Shut Your Gob and Listen to ME!” by trying to advise David Blaine when he was suspended “in his Perspex Box above the River Thames in London.” 

  Proops somehow propelled herself onto the top of Blaine’s box, and while the magician was completely ignoring her Proops tripped and revealed to the world that she doesn’t wear underpants!  “I know I should have been wearing drawers,” she said later, ‘but they don’t go with a red hat. . .” the First Lady’s workout guru offered afterwards.

  She used this both exciting and shocking incident to catapult herself into the world of celebrity bling and promote her vibrating slab of exercise torture to which our FLOTUS daily devotes her precious White House time and increasingly toned body. 

 Consider this morsel of insider poop from a well placed Michelle watcher: “for each tasty treat she [Michelle] eats, she spends up to another ten minutes on the Vibration Plate Exercise Machine she bought from Wilma Proops.”

  This device which resembles a huge rubber band wraps around various body parts, and is said to  vibrate them in such a way that only about ten minutes of workout equates to at least an hour on conventional gym time!

 Dressed like royalty for a photo op at a soup kitchen  

     But, wait, that’s not all.  With Jill Biden at her side, early in her tenure, our first lady went to feed the poor at a D.C. food kitchen in $540 gym shoes by Lanvin and Madame Obama is known for sporting a $1,000 designer porte-monnaie!

 Another observer commented, “…in the middle of a tough recession when millions of Americans have been forced to pare down, Michelle Obama (is) sporting hideously expensive designer duds.  Her Moschino coat is said to retail for $2,763.”  And we all tsk tsk at her increasing penchant for using European designer threads instead of featuring American designers!  Didn’t one of her favorite dressmakers go belly up recently? 

 But taking the cake so far this year is Jenna Lynn, J. Crew’s president and creative designer.  Lynn, whose company sells those cardigans Michelle just loves, painted her very young son’s toenails a neon pink color, and put him on display with her in a happy face picture in their spring catalog.

 Psychiatrist Dr. Keith Ablow disapproves of such androgynous decoration when he told Fox News that “our culture is being encouraged to abandon all trappings of gender identity.”  Well, why not?  From an exercise guru who presents over the Thames to a little boy’s pink toenails, may we just say our First Lady really knows how to pick ‘em!

 To contact your Congressional Representative use this link: http://www.contactingthecongress.org/

 To read more about our “royal” First Lady use these links:

 http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/washington/2009/05/michelle-obama-shoes.html  

 http://wizbangblog.com/content/2010/01/21/another-michelle-obama-wardrobe-malfunction.php   

 http://newsflavor.com/politics/us-politics-the-white-house-insider-the-exercise-regime-and

 http://hubpages.com/hub/Who-Just-is-this-Wilma-Proops–Agony-Aunt-to-the-Stars

 This day in history May 8

1970: The “Hard Hat riot” occurs in the Wall Street area of New York City as construction workers clashed with anti war demonstrators protesting the Viet Nam War.

1986: The worst nuclear power plant accident in history occurred at Chenobyl near Kiev USSR.

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